Recovering from a loss

We cannot control or influence curve balls life throws at us such as sudden trauma or loss, but we can protect ourselves from the impacts by having a sound estate plan in place and appropriate insurance cover.

If you are unsure what plans you have in place then it’s time to book a review meeting with your financial adviser who can look at your individual circumstances and advise on any gaps in your overall financial plan.

There are many types of trauma and loss we may experience in our lifetime. This includes financial (assets, property, livelihood and cash), physical (death, disability or severe illness), and emotional (grief, trauma, denial and isolation).

What comfort can a financial adviser provide?

In times of loss there are professionals who can help get your affairs sorted so you can return to normality as much as possible, as quickly as possible.

A financial adviser is often able to assist as they have detailed knowledge of your financial affairs, insurance cover and estate planning wishes. If you experience trauma or loss, get in touch with your financial adviser, tell them what has occurred and let them guide you.

They may assist with:

• Liaising with insurers on your behalf
• Processing insurance claims
• Processing estate planning paperwork and talking to your family and beneficiaries
• Liaising with your accountant, solicitor and powers of attorney
• Putting you in touch with local community services
• Advising on steps to financial recovery
• Drawing down on superannuation if early access is an option.

If you have suffered a loss and would like help working through the myriad of paperwork, don’t go it alone. Your financial adviser is well-placed and willing to assist.

What comfort can friends and family provide?

After a major event care and support is needed to help ease the impact of the trauma or loss, but for many people, it can be hard to know how to respond and support your friends and family.

The type of support you can provide is often simple things, that if done in a respectful way, will be invaluable.

Here are some suggestions:

• Spend time with the person, let them know you are there for them
• Don’t let them spend the first few nights alone or in an empty house
• Allow them to cry
• Listen to them and try not to direct the conversation back to yourself
• Avoid telling them you know how they feel, it’s more helpful to tell them you are sorry for what they have been through and you want to assist in their recovery
• Sometimes a simple gesture like a hug is all they need
• Help with everyday tasks such as cooking, cleaning, child minding.

Children experience strong emotions during and after events and may find it difficult to articulate how they are feeling. No matter how much we want to, we can’t protect children from experiencing strong emotions and distress following major events, but we can help to reduce the impact of the trauma or loss.

• Give ongoing reassurance, tell them they are safe, and try to normalise their feelings
• Provide information in a way that is appropriate for their age, listen patiently and respond to their fears
• Encourage children to express their emotions, even if you as an adult would not express your feelings in the same way
• Spend more time with them, give lots of cuddles and give them the opportunity to talk
• Bedtime may be when feelings of fear are strongest so spend extra time preparing for bedtime together, read a story in bed, having a comforting warm drink, stay with them until they fall asleep
• Keep to their usual routine as much as possible.